It Never Fails

There’s an instance in the New Testament where the mortal Jesus Christ shows signs of being in flow. Flow is an optimal mental state characterized by intense focus on an activity to the extent that basic needs become negligible. It's a blissful blurring of time, space and even sense of self.

We find the evidence in The Gospel According to John. The Lord, wearied from His travels by foot, paused at Jacob’s well while His disciples went to get food at a neighbouring city. A Samaritan woman appeared at the well, waterpot in hand. Jesus asked her to draw water for Him. They begin a conversation.

Seems like a pretty ordinary interaction, except that according to customs of the day it was practically scandalous behaviour. Jews didn't socialize with Samaritans because they were thought to be unclean and idolatrous, and men generally didn't converse with lowly, servile women.

Despite these cultural improprieties, Jesus had compassion for the Samaritan woman. Instead of small talk, He got right down to business. He told her of living water that would never fail and that would slake the thirst of her soul. He wanted this woman with a history of immorality and broken marriages to experience divine love. Then He disclosed His secret identity: He being the living water, the long-awaited Messiah.

That’s when the disciples returned from the city with food. Their arrival on the scene must have interrupted the conversation, because the Samaritan woman promptly left to tell others of her discovery.

As she hurried back to town under the blazing midday sun, I imagine Jesus watched her until she disappeared out of sight.

Then the disciples, having prepared a meal, beckoned Jesus to eat. The King James Version states “His disciples prayed Him, saying, Master, eat. (John 4:31). Evidently, the disciples are concerned. Maybe Jesus hadn’t eaten for days, yet He replied:

I have meat to eat that ye know not of. My meat is to do the will of him that sent me, and to finish his work. Say not ye, There are yet four months, and then cometh harvest? behold, I say unto you, Lift up your eyes, and look on the fields; for they are white already to harvest. (John 4:34-35)

Jesus was so involved in the work of saving souls for His Father, it usurped the desire to eat. As John Gill’s Bible commentary put it: the harvest of souls he had a prospect of was as meat unto him, delightful and refreshing; and his mind and thoughts were so taken up with these things, that he had no inclination to any corporeal food.

Gill’s description is certainly characteristic of being in a flow state, albeit flow motivated by great compassion. Those of the Christian faith call this agape love or charity, the pure love of Christ. Buddhists in the Mahayana tradition use the Sanskrit word bodhicitta to describe something similar. Bodhicitta (approximate translation is “awakening mind”) is a single minded dedication to helping others find freedom from suffering.

Of course, flow can be induced by all kinds of activities, both secular and spiritual. Playing video games and musical instruments are two common pathways. Meditation is another. However there is a caveat. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, the psychologist who coined the term flow writes in his book Finding Flow that...

Flow is a source of psychic energy in that it focuses attention and motivates action. Like other forms of energy, it is neutral – it can be used for constructive or destructive purposes. Fire can be used to warm us up on a cold night or it can be used to burn down the house. The same is true of electricity or nuclear energy. Making energy available for human use is an important accomplishment, but learning how to use it well is at least as essential. Thus, in creating a good life it is not enough to strive for enjoyable goals, but also to choose goals that will reduce the sum total of entropy in the world.

In other words, flow can bloom into self-transcendence and increased compassion or be a regression into selfishness and social alienation. It all depends on the activity you’re intensely focusing on. When Jesus told His disciples to “lift up your eyes”, He wanted them to awaken to what is truly important.

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FOR A BETTER WORLD, CLAIM THE BLAME

About a year ago over lunch I told my daughter that every idiosyncrasy, addiction and personality flaw she had was my fault. I am to blame for any money and relationship problems she might have too. And I meant it.

Why? The problems and challenges she has today stem from when she was a baby and under my care. Except I wasn't a good father back then. Too young and immature, always stressed and never psychologically present. As Gabor Mate says in his important book In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts, infants read, react to and are developmentally influenced by the psychological states of the parents. My daughter likely learned my negative emotional patterns and dysfunctional coping mechanisms. I was one of her primary role models.

However (and thankfully) she is not a negative person. She has always been loving and funny and today she works as a manager at a hotel. But this is despite my shoddy parenting. She overcame the deficits I imposed upon her, and she suffered through my divorce that left her with emotional and psychological scars.

So I apologized to her for my failings, and took the blame for everything she didn't like about herself and her situation. We both cried, although I tried my best not to. It was not time for me to feel sorry for myself. It was time to take the blame and be strong. She forgave me and we moved on to happier topics: music, her upcoming trip to Spain, work etc. We have been much closer ever since.

Drive All Blames into One

Tibetan Buddhists have the saying “drive all blames into one”. What that means (from this Western, individualistic perspective) is to take responsibility for everything in our awareness. I didn't know about this saying during that lunch with my daughter, but it's something I've always tried to practice. It's the reason why I pick up plastic litter in my neighbourhood. I perceive it to be a problem, and if I don't take responsibility for it, who will?

A much bolder example of driving all blames into one is in the remarkable book What is Buddhist Enlightenment? by Dale S. Wright. It was after the Rodney King beatings, when four (white) LAPD officers savagely beat unarmed (black) civilian Rodney King and it was captured on video. The footage was televised worldwide. Amidst the growing outrage and calls for justice, the only one to take full responsibility for the sickening display of ultraviolence was a Buddhist monk who didn’t even live in the United States.

In an LA Times editorial the monk claimed that he was the policemen who beat Rodney King. He also declared:

From the Buddhist perspective, I have not practiced deeply enough to transform the situation with the policemen. I have allowed violence and misunderstanding to exist.

After claiming the blame he proposed a solution: the practice of mindfulness. He said mindfulness begets insight and understanding, and out of this comes love. We either become mindful and compassionate towards each other, or we continue to accept violence as a way of life and perpetuate the vicious cycle.

This Vietnamese monk was Thich Nhat Hanh. Thich Nhat Hanh went on to write numerous books to help people live harmoniously. He continues to bear the responsibility to make the world better.

One final thing to add: I consider myself a multi-religious person, but I’m a disciple of Jesus Christ first and foremost. He is the ultimate example of claiming the blame. In an act of love and sacrifice unparalleled in history, the Son of God atoned for the sins of the world and offers us solutions to all of our problems. To Him I am most grateful.

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